Wednesday, October 10, 2012

Ultrasounds Are Weird


My Wife's Uterus!
      We're in a dark room.  My wife's uterus is on TV.  I'm sitting on a stool behind the technician while she pokes my wife's belly with a little wand.  The screen is facing away from Kate but I can clearly see what's going on.  The technician is making polite small talk, but not saying anything of substance.  I just want her to say "Oh look at her lady parts!" or "now THAT is a son!", but instead she's clicking her buttons and measuring femurs arms and baby cranium.  I'm trying not to ask too many questions, as I don't want her to distract her from her important job of bits finding.

     There's a breif panicky moment when she tells us that the baby is hiding behind Kate's belly button, so she can't see what she needs to see.  So what is the professional, medically sound way of dealing with this?  She pokes the baby!  This results in the strangest thing I've seen so far.  The baby looks cranky but moves (I'm pretty sure I saw some sass on the baby's face.)  The craziest part was seeing the movement.  Once the tech points out arms and legs and head (still no bits) I can really see the baby moving around, kicking, and even her heart beating! Incredibly surreal, but VERY cool.

     After snapping a couple other pictures she asks us if we'd like to see what we're having.  The moment of truth is at hand.  She turns the screen so that Kate can see it and there on screen.... is our baby's butt.  Huh.  Well, baby, the 5th photo taken of you was of your butt.  How bout that?  The tech points at the screen at an indecernible black spot and says "See that?  That's the labia.  You're having a girl!"

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2 weeks ago a work conversation turned towards my wife and I's pregnancy.  A woman asked me "Do you have an preference as to what you'll have?"  As anyone who has read previous blog entries know, the answer is, not really.  I explain that I'm a fan of novelty, so if I already had a boy or girl, the answer would be, whichever I don't already have.  As that's not the case the answer is, either way.  The woman informs me, "Oh, it's your first?  Well then you need to have a boy." 

"Oh really?  Why's that?" I ask.

"So that he can look out for any girls you  might have!"  She replies, completely seriously.

"" I responded.

I decided at that point that I hoped to have a girl.  Not because I'm THAT contrarian (I'm not, and anyone who tells you different is wrong!) but because we need more girls out there to counter this type of attitude.  We need more rough and tumble, confident, intelligent and independent women.  My girl will look out for herself, thank you very much.  And if another baby comes along later, boy or girl, they'll look out for each other!  Not because of antiquated gender roles, but because they're siblings, damnit, and that's what people who love each other do!

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Back in the ultrasound room Kate and I squeeze each other's hands and look at our little girl on the screen.  I use the pronoun "She".  We toss the word "Daughter" back and forth, seeing how it feels.  It feels good.  It feels right.  So we've got our daughter.  We've got our pronoun.  Now all we need is a name.  And to paint the nursery.  And take birthing classes.  And get some car seats.  And find a daycare.  And, and, and, and...  Hoo boy.  This just got REAL.



Dad element of excitement for the day:  I can't wait to take photos of Buster and my daughter.  Baby/Dog photos are my favorite. 

9 comments:

  1. A grand post! Bravo.

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    1. She's going to have a great example in "Aunt Cindy"!

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  3. Buster is gonna love her!! The cats on the other hand...

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  4. Love! I know all about the poking and pissing off the baby. Baby Boy Rezac (who we affectionately call Luda Chris) had his arm across his chest so the tech could not see the heart the way she wanted. However he did not wait long to show us he was a boy. In fact, she put that wand on my belly and just like a good Rezac showed off his man "bits". She didn't even have to tell me, I knew. Can't wait to swap stories at holiday time!

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    1. Ha! I love the name! I'm impressed that you were able to tell gender right off the bat! We totally had to be shown what's up. I'm also so excited for holiday story swapping. You girls are going to be SO big!!!

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  5. Mike,

    I'm loving your posts. I told G-ma about them and she wants me to print them out which I intend to do.

    You're right, gender doesn't matter. A healthy baby--boy or girl. I used to say ten fingers, ten toes and a big brain. At our first ultra-sound before Grace was born I saw was a little hand pop up showing five distinct fingers. It was if she was talking to me, saying hey Dad, look. And like your experience, the reality started that day.

    All the best to you and Kate, enjoy the miraculous ride.

    Uncle.

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    1. Thanks for the kind words, Jeff! As you guys have shown, kids are gonna be a blast no matter what you have. And hey, with the Ferris genes mixing up with the Rezacs, there's NO WAY this kids not gonna have a big ole' brain. :)

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